MIDDLE AGE BLUES
K.V Satyanarayana, M.Sc
Late
Sri K. V Satyanarayana Garu , was a Retired Head of the department
of Chemistry , A.N.R. College
Man’s life span can conveniently be split into meaningful
stages: infancy (childhood), youth or
adolescence, middle age and old age.
Since infancy or childhood is an undeveloped stage both physically and
mentally, the kids are not responsible for what they do and do not do. For all that happens to them the elders are
squarely responsible whose pleasant (sometimes painful) duty it is to look
after their daily needs-food, health, growth, education.
Adolescence or youth is,
paradoxically, both a developed and an undeveloped phase. Adolescents are both knowledgeable and ignorant. They don’t (and sometimes can’t) hold
themselves responsible for occurrence in and around the family. They are generally in a hurry and exuberant
and ebullient. And, while not all their
deeds and decisions are objectionable, not all their goings-on are
Spartan. They are, in short, in a
happy-go-lucky life. It is incumbent on
the elders (especially the middle aged parents) to watch and warn them with
utmost circumspection. To be ideal, they
should neither be too harsh not too soft- a daunting challenge indeed!
It is pertinent here to jump our
order and turn our searchlight on old age.
According to a generally accepted view middle age spans the period
between 40 and 65 years, and the period beyond 65 is undisputed old age. There is a progressive wear-out taking a
steep dip. As if to compensate this
physical and physiological decadence old age is endowed with accumulation of
decades of life’s vicissitudes and their lessons. There is wisdom together with a wizened
condition. They cannot fend for
themselves as effectively as in the past.
Their main worry seems to be how best to live their remaining years
without throwing undue burden on others and yet craving external assistance in
a large measure.
Middle age is the most crucial
phase of all. It encounters
multidimensional travails. To begin
with, “middle agers” (the coinage may be pardoned) typically have to tend their
children who are, at this point of time, at the fag-end of teenage and about to
cross twenties, and also, in an average contemporary ethos, at the threshold of
higher/ technical education. Since a
vast majority of “middle agers” are from the middle class of the society their
financial status is not absolutely guaranteed.
Even if the children are brilliant and secure creditable ranks in the
entrance tests, the higher/technical education, the coveted course, entails
thousands, nay, lakhs of rupees to see them trough. Since, in general, the wards are away from
them, their health and well-being also cause constant anxiety. All this is because
the parents are naturally desirous of their children’s éclat. During or soon after their education,
consequent worries also hang on the parents-success at the job mela and
matrimony. Matrimony, especially, is an
inevitable obligation for the parents (unless, as in few instances, love
marriage obliterates the obligation).
On the other side, the “middle agers”
have their own parents (usually in their 70s and 80s) who have to be looked
after (because of nature’s negations noted above). Besides the care and anxiety about the
youngsters (their offspring), and the oldsters (their parents), the “middle
agers” face their own personal problems health wise. The lady of the house has reached a critical
stage of her life—menopause. This
condition afflicts most women with hot flushes, hyperhidrosis (excessive
sweating), insomnia, irritability and, occasional inexplicable behavior. The man of the house, though he doesn’t
actually experience cessation of menstruation (literal meaning of menopause),
still suffers from some of the unwelcome symptoms—what has come to be labeled
“male menopause”.
All in all, the average middle—aged man
and woman are burdened with anxiety about youngsters and the oldsters as well
as about their own day-to-day woes – finance, health, job, or other vocational
glitches. However, most of the “middle
agers” sail safely through the turbulent river of life. Their assets include age (which is on their
side), physical and mental verve and a highly sentimental commitment. The family’s health and happiness and, in a
wider sense, those of the society at large, depend to a great deal on the
“middle agers”. They can enjoy a modicum
of solace if their children (especially when they are old enough to understand
things) and their parents try to understand the odds and ordeal through which
the “middle agers” pass. (4th October 2010)
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